Welcome back or welcome (for those of you who are new to this mayhem) to the misadventures of GRAMPAS ON THE LOOSE AGAIN!!!!!!! and sending MESSAGES FROM THE BOTTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!It has been a few years since I have attempted to write about my wanderings and ramblings, but with incarceration, therapy, and medication I am convinced, NAY I SAY, absolutely sure that I should start irritating all who want to participate in this self abuse or as I look at it, GROUP THERAPY FOR THOSE WHO DON'T REALLY NEED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so it is time to fasten your seat belts, put your seat backs and trays in their upright positions, please have OXYGEN and any other medications required, (alcohol is considered medication) if consumed in moderation????? OR NOT!!!!!!!!!!! on standby to keep anyone from calling ahead and having me picked up, locked up, wrapped up, or tied up (unless there are whips, chains, or handcuffs involved??????) along the way as I am not sure how long it would take for these messages from a bottle, that would be the bottle I have with me, not the one you get messages in!!!!!!!
I get the message from the bottle and send it to you. Of course if I try and absorb to much of the message bottle then it may take a little longer to get the message out to everyone??????? First I have a movement??????? (not that kind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I guess I should have said EPIPHANY, now how is that for a word??????? Are you impressed and this is just the first MESSAGE FROM A BOTTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I begin writing these epistles of less than stellar literature which sometimes ramble and make absolutely no sense at all, but since I have no LITERARY LICENSE, I am lucky to have a drivers license!!!!!!! I can assure whoever or whomever (I wanted to cover myself so I used both of them) reads this stuff will be mystified, stooopified, rareified, modified, and probably DEEP FRIED before this is over with. I have created this blog so that I do not have to notify all the thousands whom/who {wasn't sure about this one either} I am sure will be lining up to read this GENIUS PROSE, how's that folks for a starter??????? unless they want to??????????
You should be able to check at your leisure and see if there has been any activity??????? If nothing is posted for a while then one {or maybe two or three} can only assume that I have been detained and/or incarcerated for an indeterminate {now there is a word!!!!!!!!!} length of time???????
I left on this SOJOURN OF MANY MILES, (for those of you who are not sure of these big words, just do like I do, {look it up in your FUNK & WAGNALL}!!!!! to begin my quest again for the meaning of life.
I will include pictures and clues as to where I am, but no definite locations so that I can always stay one step ahead of the gentlemen with the WRAP AROUND SUIT JACKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and for the protection of any innocent bystanders!!!!!!!!!!!! I have attached pictures so that you know who is who is this comedy of errors. My truck I have named Miss Mabel, the mini-hummer (I am older now and my testosterone level is not as high so I don't need a big hummer) name is ??????????? since I am unable to come up with a name, I will leave that to the audience with the final selection to be determined by a panel of judge. Why you say did I not use a plural on judge??????? well that would be because I am the only judge on the panel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There will be a prize awarded for the winning name {prize to be determined at a later date} and last but not least the driver, that would be me as the HOOD ORNAMENT. Please send all entries for the NAME THE HUMMER CONTEST to my email address.
And now for your clues??????? I am 538 miles south of Tellico Plains, Tenn.and 2983 miles southeast of Portland, Ore.
Since this is all new to me, you will all have to suffer QUIETLY, I MIGHT ADD as I get all the bugs worked out.
Since this is all new to me, you will all have to suffer QUIETLY, I MIGHT ADD as I get all the bugs worked out.
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