Airing Out, Medical Attention, and Lost Relatives

Here I am where I will stay for a few days as Miss Mabel needs her oil changed and needs to get her feet switched around. She gets a little cranky if I don't do these things on a regular basis. Must be one of those FEMALE THINGS???????

Blue Boy also had some problems which had to be fixed also. Unfortunately he broke his left rear leg...... The good news is I have a friend up here (I know, using my name and friend in the same sentence just don't make any sense at all!!!!!) who was able to fix Blue Boy and get him running again. He also required a new steering control arm and front shocks. The poor boy was really quite tired and beat up. I guess if somebody dragged me for about 3000 or so miles I would be a little out of sorts also. Just as a footnote to this paragraph. My starting milage was 214,556 and my milage to this point is 218,060 and for thgose of you who are mathmatically challenged, that means that I have traveled 3504 miles, I am averaging 14 miles a gallon and total gas cost is $567.00 and I still know where I am cause I read the city limits sign!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The other good news is that I have been able to take a shower on a regular basis much to the joy of my neighbors up here. When I pulled in I was asked to park in an area some distance away and if I would please leave the windows open for a while so Miss Mabel could air out and a shower was the first order of business for me!!!!!!!!!!!!

After airing out, hosing down, and getting the medical appointments set up for my companions, I treated myself to a real meal. When I travel, I do not stop to eat. I only feed Miss Mabel. I drink coffee, eat peanut butter and cheese crackers, raisins and prunes. I know, a bit of a weird diet, but I dont get hungry so I guess it works??????????

So after all the medical, eating, and sleeping was done the next day I went looking around town to see how much it had changed. I suppose I ought to at this point tell everyone that I grew up here. Every thing I am today is because of this town!!!!!!!!!!!! and you can take that anyway you want to??????????????

Many years before we arrived here, some distant relatives apparently settled here. Some years later after I had removed myself from here, (more by request than choice, but that is another story) the city fathers erected a statue of one of my relatives (see attached pictures) and to this day, he still stands imposing at the north end of town.

Mike and Gene, the secret is out, so be proud of your ancestors!!!!! (now you know where I get it from). I will be here a few more days and then off again and heading further north to work for a while, but fear not for there will be stories, maybe not from this adventure until I am on the move again, but from my past escapades.

NANU NANU from the PLANET MELMAC

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A real SHOWER is only a drive away

It is now 2:30 in the morning, I am just not sure which morning, and since every mornig has a 2:30, I guess I will not worry about it. But all the trucks have left the rest area so it must be time to go???? So some water on the face, swallow a little toothpaste, take a picture of the pay phone and I am gone again!!!!!!

Coming into California is really something. The scenery along the way I traveled was spectacular and of course it is all open grazing range so driving in this area at night is not recommended as there are BLACK ANGUS all over the area {they actually have road warning signs} and hitting one of those will really do some damage to your car, not to mention what it will do to the animal!!!!!!!

The first and foremost thing about California that you must remember is that you always plan your trip so that if gas is required and a stop must be made, DO NOT BUY ANY MORE THAN ABSOLUTELY REQUIRED TO GET YOU OUT OF THE STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The cheapest gas I saw in California was $3.05 a gallon and it only went up from there. The roads I took to get me into Oregon allowed for me to gas up in Nevada and make it all the way to Oregon (at $2.69 a gallon in Oregon also, you are still ahead of the game!!!!). The roads were two lane and back in the woods with little traffic so it was easy traveling without the traffic.

For those of you interested, the route is 395 out of Sparks, NE. to Susanville and then 44 to Old Station and then 89 to Mount Shasta which is not only a town, but also a mountain which I took a couple of windshield shots of. And so some 7 1/2 hours later I finally reach my rest point..............................
C U WEN I C U

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Nevada is interesting even in the dark

When coming into Nevada, one needs to consider that fuel stops are critical due to all the mountain climbing required. I just never figured out why it was necessary to travel I-80 in Nevada at 80 plus miles an hour unless the hiway number equals the speed limit, but I thought that only counted in Montana????? It would seem to me that at $2.69 a gallon for gas, one might want to consider slowing down just a little??????? But since there were more than one, then one can only assume that more than one requires that all except one must GO REALLY FAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And since I was the only one, I must have gotten the exemption.

My intent was to go to Sparks and fuel up, but unfortunately the mountains require more fuel so a stop in Winnemucca was needed. I wonder what Winnemucca means??????? I can only think that it would be part of some language that means, loosely translated, "people who go fast get to buy more gas"?????????????

There is not much to tell about Nevada as I was driving in the dark most of that state, of course I am in the dark most of the time anyway, but I did notice a couple of things.

Gas is higher the farther west you get and I don't understand that, but it is just one of those unexplained anomalies {I haven't used a big fancy word in a while so I thought I would throw that in} and since I have absolutely no idea what that means, that makes it even more fun...............

The only two things I know for sure about Nevada is that the MUSTANG RANCH is off of exit 28 and they have pay phones in the rest areas.!!!!! I bring up the pay phone only because I have not seen any in years. If they have them down south, I have no idea where they are. I got so excited that I actually took a picture which you find on this post. The pay phone is at a rest area in Fernley, Nevada for those possibly going on a tour of phone booths.

Well, it is about 10 pm and time for some sleep. So I pull in between a couple of 18 wheelers, make Miss Mabel comfortable, lock the steering on Blue Boy, crawl into the back and go to sleep.

And the Race is On

When you do a trip like this you do not have to plan your stops, but you better plan your gas ups or you can find your self out in the middle of no where dialing 1-800 AAA and telling them to bring gas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had plenty of fuel when I got into Evanston, Wy., but from there to the other side off Utah is not a long stretch, but long enough and with enough mountains to eat up the fuel that I filled up in Evanston, Wy. and headed on down 80 with the intention of filling up in West Wendover, Nev.

Utah is not really that exciting to travel across until you get into Salt Lake City. I have driven in Los Angeles, Miami, and Washington D.C., but nothing quite prepares you for Salt Lake when you have a tow vehicle and you are surrounded by what can only be described as Richard Petty/Mario Andretti WANNABE'S in bumper cars. I was lucky as I came through on a Sunday around noon. The thought of having to drive that on a rush hour weekday would make me want to drink and do drugs as a serious habit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one on the road in Salt Lake when I came through offers any mercy, nor do I assume they expect any!!!!!!!!!!!! So I just set my cruise on 60, turned up my SIRIUS 50's music, turned on my emergency flashers, and stuck my head out the window and started screaming "NO BRAKES, NO BRAKES" and it seemed to work, for what reason I am not sure. Maybe it was because I was wearing a life preserver??????? I will never know for sure because when I head back I will be going a different way, but I will keep the life preserver just in case!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Since you are reading this you obviously know or I would hope that you know that I escaped Salt Lake City with nary a scratch, dent, not even a slight concussion. But it was definitely more fun than an E-RIDE at Disney!!!!!!!

So with the Salt Lake City limits sign in my rear view mirror I headed out onto the salt flats. This has got to be the worlds largest salt shaker. Talk about a salt high, this is the place. The pictures attached show one of the flats, that is salt and not snow, and the other one shows salt stacked up REALLY HIGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!You are almost to the Nevada State line, before getting to the Bonneville salt track. I just don't know why you would want to drive on salt??????? I live by the Atlantic ocean and the salt eats everything up. I guess they just run the car and then make a million salt shakers out of it??????????????

I went through here some time in the late 70's, but the year escapes me, {if I could just find the bottle or at least my memory medicine, I just cannot remember where I put it??????} I am sure the bottle would be better because then I would not need to remember anything and who knows maybe I might even get a message????????????? and so just as a footnote I actually made it to Wells, Nev., just a little farther inside Nevada and fueled up and never saw the CONTINENTAL DIVIDE again??????? and so it was off to California by way of Nevada and more adventures????????????????

C U WEN I C U

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I finally took a shower!!!!!!!!

It got so bad in the truck that I had to get behind a cattle hauler just to cover the smell, even the air freshener could not keep up and when I finally took a shower at a truck stop in Cheyenne, WY. I had to put my clothes in a HAZ-MAT container for transport across state lines!!!!!

There were some exciting moments on this part of the trip. I started to see the long railroad trains. HOW LONG ARE THESE TRAINS??????? These trains are so long, they are so long that they are measured in miles and not by the amount of cars!!!!!!!!!!! I took some pictures, but could never get a really good shot as there are just to many cars....................

Then you start to see the SNOW FENCES and I KNOW, you want to know what a snow fence is?????? and if you don't, you should because there may be a test at a later date. Any way a snow fence, actually there are several of them along stretches of 80 and come winter time when the wind blows, the snow actually builds up against the fence and stays off the road to a certain point, but after so much so then it just becomes a big pile of snow.

I crossed the Continental Divide somewhere out here and the only reason I bring this up is because I crossed it twice??????????? Now I understand that at my age I probably should not be allowed to wander that much or at least wear my GPS collar or my ankle monitoring bracelet so somebody can keep track of me. My question is if something is a dividing line and I am traveling in a supposedly westerly direction, HOW CAN I CROSS IT TWICE??????????????? I must have been absent that day in class, because I looked on my map and I cannot even find it. So the class assignment is to locate the CONTINENTAL DIVIDE and tell me where it is!!!!!!! I know I will see it on the way back, at least once and who knows, maybe even twice. If you find it, send an email to me at my email........

Wyoming also has some wind farms. Really large farms. The only other place I have seen this sort of thing was out in California around Hinkley, Boron, and Edward's air force base. No, THEY DO NOT GROW WIND!!!!! They are electrical generators. I think the POLITICALLY CORRECT term is ALTERNATIVE POWER SOURCE??????????? I have included pictures of trains, snow fences and wind farms and so it is on to Utah...........................

C U WEN I C U

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DIDJA miss me???????

Well, hi there........ I'm BACKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry it took so long, but unfortunately AT&T and their AIR CARDS are not nationwide so I have to wait until I get some place where I get DATA reception, not just cell phone service. I thought they were all the same, buttttttt?????? as usual I should not think because that makes two things happen. Both Bad.... I am usually wrong and it MAKES MY HEAD HURT!!!!!!!!!! So the postings will be broken up by state until I get caught up or start drinking seriously and the HELL with the bottle messages!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, enough of that, back to the main subject of MESSAGES FROM the BOTTLE and my search for the MEANING of LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I need a bigger bottle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The last you heard from me I was at a Missouri rest stop??????? I think, from there I headed into Iowa where I spent a total of about 30 minutes. Why you ask such a short time??????? and if you don't ask I will tell you anyway because it is my BLOG!!!!!!! which brings me to this question.

What does the word BLOG mean??????

Not only am I looking for a message and searching for the meaning of life, I also need to learn the meaning of the word BLOG????

But I am starting to wander, so back to where we were. I spent a short time in Iowa simply because when you leave Missouri and travel up Hiway 29 into Iowa, you only go to exit ten which is ten miles into Iowa in the Southwest corner for any of you which may be MAP or GEOGRAPHICALLY challenged?????? You know who you are???????

Anyway Exit 10 connects to Hiway 2 which connects to Van Dorn Ave. which connects to I-80 {I bet that could be a song??????} taking you on to probably what could be considered the most boring stretch of road in the entire country. I-80 through Nebraska, Wyoming, and with the exception of one major intersection in Utah, it is a boring straight line. I even took pictures of the road!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I realize that it is the quickest way to get across country, but it is so boring!!!!!!! HOW BORING IS IT YOU ASK, AND IF YOU DIDN'T, WELL THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE!!!!!!!!! because I am going to tell you anyway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is so boring that I actually took pictures of myself in the truck, my GPS, my rearview mirror, and the road!!!!!!! Just enjoy the pictures and keep your comments to your self!!!!!!!!!!!

I did find a museum in Nebraska that is all Chevrolets. It is called CHEVYLAND and to the best of what I could tell, the museum has a collection of one Chevrolet to represent each year that chevys have been made. It is quite a museum and I would recommend a stop be made if time allows.

Now it is on to Wyoming and more fun on the road?????

C U WEN I C U

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It is daylight so I am not lost???????

The last I saw of Kentucky was the WELCOME TO KENTUCKY sign in my rear view mirror as I crossed the Ohio River??????????? into the birth place of Lincoln which is Indiana, not to be confused with the land of Lincoln which would be Illinois, at least that is what it said on the signs each time I went into another state or maybe I was just in the STATE OF CONFUSION and have just come to realize that!!!!!!!!!!!

I am going to add a section on roads, mileage, and gas prices for your information and EDIFICATION. I am not sure what that word means, but I figured it was a good place to use it.................
For the most part the roads have been good with the exception of Illinois which has roads that equal those of Mississippi and when you put them on a scale of 1 to 10, they both come up a MINUS NINE!!!!!!!! To say the roads are good is like saying General Custer had a real good time at Little Big Horn!!!!!!!!!!!! The biggest problem is just trying to keep up speed and not bend a tire rim or blow out a shock absorber!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well, that is enough soapbox for this time.

To this point I have traveled 1454 miles and right now I think I am in a rest area in Missouri. Gas prices are averaging $2.24 a gallon with the cheapest being $2.13 in Georgia and the highest being $2.44 in Kentucky.

I crawled into the back of Miss Mabel about 11 last night and went to sleep to the sound of an R V generator running and awoke this morning to the sound of raindrops on the roof. The sound of which is equivalent to the Tijuana Brass band marching through your bedroom at 4:30 in the morning playing the "HORNY BULL"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Obviously sleep being an impossibility I crawled out of the back, went to the facilities and combed my teeth and brushed my hair, woke up Miss Mabel, tried to calm BLUE BOY because he gets really nasty when it rains. He has a tendency to put the brakes on and lock up his tires, but I wiped his windshield and we made nice and all was well so off we went.

I am sending this from a rest area, but like I said I am just not sure where, but it is daylight now so I am not completely lost???????

From out here somewhere, I am still looking for my bottle as it is "ALWAYS FIVE O'CLOCK SOMEWHERE," and still searching for the meaning of life, but I think I will settle for coffee right now........ I suppose sometime today I should probably stop at a truck stop and get a shower since the security in the rest areas frown on me taking a bath in their fountains??????? and this air freshener just ain't gettin it!!!!!!!
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I am OUTTA here

Well, the warden signed my release papers today so I will be released and on my way tomorrow.

So it is WESTWARD HO THE WAGONS, or in this case, C'mon Mabel, let's GIT-R-DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have attached some pictures so you can see what has been done since I have been held here!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THe pictures are in order from bottom to top. {Don't Ask}

The first picture shows the OLDEST INMATE holding a rope tied to the warden's foot who is up on the roof laying down so he can cut the excess roof off. The second picture shows the warden on the roof with the saw.The third picture is an after shot showing that since no one fell off the roof, all is right with the world and we are all buddies again.

Unfortunately the OLD GUY did not clean his plate at supper time so he has been sentenced to a time to be determined!!!!!!! I on the other hand behaved my self {no comments are required here!!!!!!} and got an early release for good behavior. And so as my SOJOURN {how about that word, huh??????} takes me further west, it is hard to say where I will show up next, BUTTTTTTTTT??????

I am going to add something here as a warning. From time to time my mind wanders even more than I do. {I know that is hard to beleive, but it is sadly true} SOOOOOOOOO, when that happens I will fill in with another story from another lifetime just for the fun of it.........

Remember it is my BLOG and I can do anything I want!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Well, here I am again, letting you know that I am still OUT THERE SOMEWHERE??????? I have not been incarcerated, I may have been inebriated, resuscitated, or reincarnated???????

It was an exciting time getting from where I was to where I am now. I know longer travel using AAA triptiks since I finally realized that I should get into the 20th century. Actually life as I know it ended August 1969 with Woodstock and nothing has been the same since!!!!!{ ; - ( But here I am rambling on and not addressing the issues at hand and since I am not exactly sure what all that means I will leave it in here just so hopefully there will be one more person as confused as I am??????????
PLEASE REFER TO THE 2ND PARAGRAPH..........so I decided that a GPS was the wave of the future and purchased one. Now you have to understand that this was a REALLY BIG STEP FOR ME!!!!!!!!!! since the voice on mine is female {or I assume it is} and with certain exceptions I have been known to not really pay much attention, {to the female voice that is} I have to trust what she is saying, and since I left my leash and shock collar at home, however I did bring my handcuffs!!!!!!! I have to assume that she knows what she is talking about. HOWEVER, I followed her directions and I ended up in Copperhill and I am quite sure it was Lucy's fault, {Lucy would be the GPS for future reference} that I got lost in a town that has one main street, so I went a little ways and the map actually disappeared on Lucy and she quit talking to me!!!!!!!!!!!! So after a short break and me threatening to throw her in the Ocoee River, we came to an agreement that I would make nice and she would show me the map.

So I turned Miss Mabel around and off we went in a cloud of dust, Lucy, The Unnamed Blue Hummer, and the Hood Ornament. If you are having a problem with the names, refer back to the first posting.

At this point I was not sure where I was as far as to which state I was in, Georgia, Tennessee, or Confusion, so like the song says, "It is always 5 o'clock somewhere," I stopped, checked my BOTTLE FOR MESSAGES........, was not getting anything except starting to feel better, {I MISS MY SHOCK COLLAR} and headed toward where ever. Lucy was feeling better, maybe because I plugged her into the cigarette lighter and off we went through Ducktown, Turtletown, Farner, Cokercreek, and Ballplay and finally arrived at our destination where we spent the night. I awoke the next morning to freezing temperatures!!!!!!!!!!!!!! {SEE ATTACHED PICTURES}

After bundling up, I charged up Lucy, turned on Miss Mabel, {IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!}, checked BLUE Boy's {I think that is what I will call the hummer until a name is decided upon} lights and headed north {WHY WOULD I HEAD NORTH INTO MORE COLD??????} for bluegrass and horse country for my next exciting and memorable or not??????? stop.

So that is where I am now and the will be until I leave again. I am 227 miles east and a little north of Ft. Campbell, Ky. 757 miles north and a little east of Wildwood, fl. and 2509 miles east and a little south of Grants Pass, Ore.

I have attached pictures of where I am being held captive until the work is done. I guess you might call this a WORK RELEASE PROGRAM???????
I will be trying to get a message from the MAGIC bottle, at least one from the bottle, until when????????????

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The Introduction or???????????

Welcome back or welcome (for those of you who are new to this mayhem) to the misadventures of GRAMPAS ON THE LOOSE AGAIN!!!!!!! and sending MESSAGES FROM THE BOTTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has been a few years since I have attempted to write about my wanderings and ramblings, but with incarceration, therapy, and medication I am convinced, NAY I SAY, absolutely sure that I should start irritating all who want to participate in this self abuse or as I look at it, GROUP THERAPY FOR THOSE WHO DON'T REALLY NEED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And so it is time to fasten your seat belts, put your seat backs and trays in their upright positions, please have OXYGEN and any other medications required, (alcohol is considered medication) if consumed in moderation????? OR NOT!!!!!!!!!!! on standby to keep anyone from calling ahead and having me picked up, locked up, wrapped up, or tied up (unless there are whips, chains, or handcuffs involved??????) along the way as I am not sure how long it would take for these messages from a bottle, that would be the bottle I have with me, not the one you get messages in!!!!!!!

I get the message from the bottle and send it to you. Of course if I try and absorb to much of the message bottle then it may take a little longer to get the message out to everyone??????? First I have a movement??????? (not that kind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I guess I should have said EPIPHANY, now how is that for a word??????? Are you impressed and this is just the first MESSAGE FROM A BOTTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And so I begin writing these epistles of less than stellar literature which sometimes ramble and make absolutely no sense at all, but since I have no LITERARY LICENSE, I am lucky to have a drivers license!!!!!!! I can assure whoever or whomever (I wanted to cover myself so I used both of them) reads this stuff will be mystified, stooopified, rareified, modified, and probably DEEP FRIED before this is over with. I have created this blog so that I do not have to notify all the thousands whom/who {wasn't sure about this one either} I am sure will be lining up to read this GENIUS PROSE, how's that folks for a starter??????? unless they want to??????????

You should be able to check at your leisure and see if there has been any activity??????? If nothing is posted for a while then one {or maybe two or three} can only assume that I have been detained and/or incarcerated for an indeterminate {now there is a word!!!!!!!!!} length of time???????

I left on this SOJOURN OF MANY MILES, (for those of you who are not sure of these big words, just do like I do, {look it up in your FUNK & WAGNALL}!!!!! to begin my quest again for the meaning of life.

I will include pictures and clues as to where I am, but no definite locations so that I can always stay one step ahead of the gentlemen with the WRAP AROUND SUIT JACKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and for the protection of any innocent bystanders!!!!!!!!!!!! I have attached pictures so that you know who is who is this comedy of errors. My truck I have named Miss Mabel, the mini-hummer (I am older now and my testosterone level is not as high so I don't need a big hummer) name is ??????????? since I am unable to come up with a name, I will leave that to the audience with the final selection to be determined by a panel of judge. Why you say did I not use a plural on judge??????? well that would be because I am the only judge on the panel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There will be a prize awarded for the winning name {prize to be determined at a later date} and last but not least the driver, that would be me as the HOOD ORNAMENT. Please send all entries for the NAME THE HUMMER CONTEST to my email address.

And now for your clues??????? I am 538 miles south of Tellico Plains, Tenn.and 2983 miles southeast of Portland, Ore.
Since this is all new to me, you will all have to suffer QUIETLY, I MIGHT ADD as I get all the bugs worked out.

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